Goodbye 2010...hello 2011

I've been spending a lot of time lately, just contemplating what this new year is going to be like. I never could have imagined that it would turn out the way it did. First, the year started with me being completely miserable because of being pregnant and then in late January I had a miscarriage. It was devastating. I thought immediately that the year was going to be horrible after that. At some points it actually did feel like it got worse. I remember as the year started I had many dreams about earthquakes, volcanoes and even storms. Shortly after that, there was the horrible earthquakes in Haiti and in many other places. There was a volcano in Iceland that was also horrible. Then spring came around March and I had that sinking feeling that something was going to go wrong in the world around April. Lo and behold, we had a horrible oil spill in April. Then when summer rolled around
I got pregnant for a second time and had another miscarriage (which my family doesn't even know about really). I tried to keep that one as quiet as possible to avoid the family feeling devastated yet again. I suffered alone with my husband and decided that we were going to do our best to move past it and try to enjoy the rest of the year. I also lost friendships of a sort. But that honestly wasn't my choice.


Now on the other hand, in late March we began our journey of traveling to Iowa to teach salsa. We flew out every other month from March to September then traveled every month until December. It was great. We have loved every minute of it (except the crappy travel delays). Financially, we were able to become more stable as opposed to barely making ends meet. We moved into a nice apartment of our own and honestly can't complain about how our lives have turned out. We also just recently found out that we were going to have another nephew. My sister-in-law is pregnant and having another baby boy. We are so excited about the new addition to our family. This year we also found out that I will be directing the Salsa Heat Training Team with my husband instead of a different instructor who has been directing with him. There is a lot of great changes happening. I also gained some amazing friendships this year and I can say with confidence that they are friendships to last a lifetime. I'm so blessed to have such wonderful friends. My walk with the Lord also took a turn for the better. I have gone through a new season of dreams and a deeper revelation of what God is revealing to me. God has shown me so many things this year that just blow my mind. I'm so privileged. I'm so blessed.

My husband and I were sitting down recently (I believe when we were in the Chicago Airport layed over), and we went through the long year we have been through event by event. We came to the conclusion that beside the losses we had this year, we have actually had a wonderful 2010. It hasn't been great, but it has turned out to be truly blessed. I can't honestly say I am that excited about 2011. I am almost walking on egg shells when it comes to the new year coming up. I am not sure how to take it. I want so badly to look forward to a wonderful exciting year coming up, but I don't want to get side swiped again like this year. I know, I know. Thats fear. I know that I shouldn't be afraid of the new year but under the circumstances, I can't help it. I'm trying to do my best to see the great possibilities to come and the new memories that are going to be made. That part is exciting. I'm just trying not to be negative about it. 

One thing I didn't do last year around this time, was make new year resolutions. I figured with my misery, what's the point. But this year I actually do have new year resolutions. I am happy that my husband and I have set goals and resolutions for 2011. One resolution I am willing to share on my blog is.....learning how to play the guitar. I have a guitar but don't know how to play it yet. I have a student that is professional classical guitar player and instructor that is willing to teach me how to play acoustic guitar. How exciting!! Maybe some day I can do a little devotional at OHOP. Ya' never know! ;o)

Anyway, I'm saying so long and farewell to 2010........ I don't want to look back on this year as being a loss but that I entered into a new season of my life with Ralph. In that aspect, I am saying hello to 2011. Hello to the possibilities (no matter how scary they are), hello to the new memories to be made and new experiences to be had. Thank you Jesus for the new season we are in. Thank you for the new year ahead. I pray with all of my heart that Ralph and I walk in your perfect will. I pray we don't get easily distracted and also pray that we step into a new realm in the spirit. ~ Amen