Dry and Weary Land

Yesterday was officially the half way mark of my 40 days. It was also the first time in 20 days that I felt so dry, tired and weary spiritually speaking. Well, I felt it physically too. Almost like I was unmotivated to do anything. I read the word yesterday and then during my prayer time, it was just blah. Nothing. Zero. Zilch. Normally I feel God's presence and get these awesome revelations of His word. Yeah, I got nothing! I feel like I'm in a dry spot right now. I mean, I don't feel as weary as yesterday but today isn't feeling that great either.

Psalm 42

 1 As the deer pants for the water brooks, So pants my soul for You, O God. 2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God?

I hope and pray that today is better than yesterday. I feel so blah on days like these. To top it off, its a gloomy day outside. Believe it or not, I love days that its all cloudy and rainy. I love when the
weather is cooler. Sigh. Maybe I should go run outside in the rain to make myself feel better. OK, I was just kidding, but I seriously would if my hubs was here and I didn't have to go to work later. I'm going to do my best to be cheerful and not sulky. I just feel like hibernating today. Maybe after I teach class tonight I will feel much better. We shall see!

It may also be because I've been feeling like something is about to happen. Some days its a good feeling, other days its a bad feeling. Its like two events looming and I'm not sure what they are. I obviously can't be excited about something bad, nor can I be upset about something good. You feel me? I just feel like its one of those things you can't explain but know that you know, that you know, that you know, is going to happen. I've actually been feeling this since the beginning of this year. The feeling never went away. Its this stirring in my spirit that some days feels like I'm on a roller coaster and we are click-clicking up to the top of a long drop of excitement and fear at the same time. You feel this burst of emotions all at once. Yeah. I feel that all the time. Except, sometimes its the excitement part of the roller coaster. Other days its that sick feeling you get inside like, "how can we stop this thing and let me off?" As each day goes by, I feel it in my spirit get stronger and stronger. Sometimes I get a break from it but most of the time I feel it. I have been praying about that feeling all year. That stirring within me. Hopefully the Lord will give me just a glimpse of what is to come. All I know is this.....ITS HARVEST TIME! Harvest for those that have been sowing good and harvest for those who have been sowing bad. Its time to reap! I'll leave you with that.