Typical day at OHOP

I just wanted to show a few pictures of what a normal day at OHOP would be like! Allow me to give you a description of what it sounds like. Well right now all I can hear is the speakers playing a Misty Edwards song called "come into your garden".......and I just love that song. Usually when there isn't live worship going on, we have the CDs playing music from the prayer room at IHOP (International House of Prayer in Kansas City, MO). On a typical day, I usually get here, and head into the briefing room to put my lunch in the fridge. Sometimes its empty, and sometimes its filled with interns or worship leaders briefing for their sets.

Now normally, if I'm not briefing for a set, I usually just go straight into the prayer room and get started on my reading and studying.

Then occassionally I will stop to just meditate on the worship music and stop to hear the voice of God. Sometimes I just sit still and quietly just listen to the music and detox all my negative feelings from the previous day or what not. Sometimes we wake up on the wrong side of the bed and just need time to just allow the Lord to fill us with his peace....

Other days I just come in and brief (we meet for 30 minutes before singing to go over scriptures, music and model). Then I spend the next two hours singing to the Lord. Or in today's case, after singing, I am blogging a bit and just studying my book about Humility.

Once I've been here a while, I usually have to leave to go to work...which I am heading out to do in a few minutes....Now if only I could find Ralph. He is somewhere in between the seats of the prayer room in his own little world. ;o)

Today's worship with the Word set...

So I just got out of the briefing room. We just finished singing for the 12:00 worship with the word set. It was awesome. Although when I first started singing it was rough today. I guess its the hardship of having to teach salsa and yell for a few hours then come to the house of prayer and sing. It takes a toll on my voice. I end up with a hoarse voice. Sometimes I have no voice at all to sing, and end up yelling out sound throughout the set or nothing will end up coming out. Its frustrating when that happens. Which is exactly what happened today. I basically went to sing and at first I was having some difficulty singing....but after the first 35-40 minutes into the set, my voice started to get warmer and I was able to flow.

Our sets are always about the same subject....Philippians 2:5-11. Basically we sing about the humility of Christ. How fitting right? That subject is tearing me up lately. Just understanding the humility of Jesus. Melany sings the first cycle of the set and I sing the second cycle. That means, we have a two hour set....and the first 30 minutes we just sing worship songs, then we spend about 30 minutes singing the scripture. After that we sing worship again for a while and then the 2nd cycle starts with the same scripture reference. Usually a different part of the scripture...meaning, the last verse or two of the passage. So when my part came to sing today.....as usual....its nerve wrecking to hear yourself singing alone on the microphone. Its not like singing on a Sunday morning service with a full band and lots of sound filling the room. When you sing with all that, its not as difficult cause your voice flaws aren't as noticeable. But boy, when you sing during one of those sets, its just Melany playing the keys and just you on the microphone. If you have a tired voice or sound hoarse....everyone can hear it. I mean, I know its not about having a great voice when you are worshiping the Lord.....but I guess my human nature...starts to worry about the flaws and it actually throws me off sometimes. I am still working on that.

For the most part, its not that bad....especially when we all start to flow together singing and exalting the Lord. I love when that happens and I can actually feel the presence of God. The only way to describe what I feel at that moment is this: as I'm singing I can feel this nervousness all over me....like in an exciting way, like the feeling you get when you are waiting in line to get on a roller coaster. You get all nervous with excitement. For me?..........I get that nervous feeling in my legs and then it just fills my entire spirit with joy but fear of the Lord at the same time. Its weird because I just can't put into words what I feel physically and spiritually. Usually when I start to really feel a tangible presence of God, I start to weep in the presence. Its this uncontrollable urge to just weep and cry. Not in a bad sorrowful way, but in a way that I can't explain. I'm not sad. I'm just in awe of the Lord...and all these emotions and thoughts go rushing in my head and into my heart. I start to remember how God saved me many times from death.....that makes me weep. Then I think in my human nature, how I have failed so many times before and the Lord forgives me in His grace and mercy. That makes me weep too. Then I think of how He loves me so much, that He gave His only Son as a living sacrifice for my redemption. Sometimes I think of looking into the eyes of Jesus....even if I have never seen Him eye to eye. But I feel Him and His love and mercy....and kindness....and grace....then I weep again. Sometimes, I get filled with such a fervent fire instead of weeping. What I mean is that I get filled with this violent fire to pray and shout out to the Lord....it literally pours out of me, especially when I am interceding. Sometimes I feel that way when I sing too. Especially during intercession sets. I just get filled with God's presence and get filled with this Holy Ghost fire and I just want my words to pierce the darkness like a sharp knife. I guess that is why my favorite scripture in the bible is Matthew 11:12 - "And from the days of John the Baptist until now, the kingdom of heaven suffers violence, and the violent shall take it by force." Wow, what an amazing scripture! That is a great description of what I feel when I get filled with the fiery presence of the Lord.

By the end of our set today, we were all flowing in the presence of God.....just singing and lifting the name of Jesus up on high. Giving Him glory and honor and praise. Its amazing. You know.........its not easy to be involved all day in the house of prayer and just have to unplug to go teach a salsa class. That is such a hard thing for me to do. But I have to constantly remind myself that its not about me, its about the Lord...and everything I do......should be for the Lord to be glorified. Even teaching a salsa class. So, even though I have to leave the presence of the Lord being in the prayer room, His presence will be with me no matter where I go. As long as I am giving the Lord all the glory and honor. Well......back to my book!

Weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning

Wow, I just got a call from my mom. She gave me terrible news that my brothers closest friend, Ruben, just died yesterday in a terrible accident. I'm pretty much in shock right now. She was crying on the phone trying to tell me about it. Its strange....I was just at the store, walking around quietly and I heard in my spirit the words "weeping may endure for a night, but joy comes in the morning." Oddly enough, the thought came to my mind about death, as if someone was going to die....or this case....already died.

My mom has this amazing gift of the spirit. She has the calling of a prophetic intercessor. She prays and God shows her things and speaks to her every day. There are times I talk to her and tell her things and she already knew before I told her. The worldly view of this gift in its distortion of the word of God, would be called psychic. But I have always learned that the things of the Lord were original and made for good and the enemy comes and takes what was made for good and distorts it for the benefit of the world. Anything that doesn't glorify the Lord, is in itself used for evil. You either for the Lord, or for the world. There is no in between.

She is just so sad and shocked because she said she just gave Ruben a hug a few days ago. He was just at my moms house with my brother. Its sad. One day you are here, and the other day you are gone....just like that. I told my mom that life is so quick here on earth. That is why I spend my time at the house of prayer, interceding and praying for others and myself. I spend my time investing in what means so much to me.....ETERNITY. So many people wonder why Ralph and I spend time at the House of Prayer on a weekly basis. My response to that is....we are only here for a short while. Most people don't make it to live past 90 years old if that. So our time here on earth is short and temporary. But our lives after being here on earth will be eternal. I am a firm believer in the word of God, and I truly believe it is the Truth of the Lord. Why invest so much time into material things like 401k's and big houses and fancy cars. Or why invest all your money into things like a golf club collection or ebay collectors items....when there are people on this earth starving to death and suffering from diseases they can't afford to treat. Or what about people that are investing their time and money into such selfish things instead of investing it in others who are less fortunate and in need? I invest my time and whatever little bit of money I have, to the house of prayer. A place where people pray, and worship the Lord and help the homeless, and feed the hungry. A place where anyone can come and be prayed for when they are suffering whether it is physical, emotional or spiritual.

My mom totally agrees with me on that. She just knew that something was going to happen. Its the mercy and grace of the Lord that my brother isn't dead right now. Ruben called him that very day, and asked him to come hang out for a while. My brother refused to go for whatever reason. I know that it was the prayers of his mother and sister that he didn't get in that car and go with Ruben and his friend. Because that same day, Ruben and his friend both died. The Lord is gracious and merciful. Ik now that many people don't believe in the Lord. They think its just a waste of time, but I have seen the hand of the Lord in my life....and its amazing. God is so good....we can't even fathom the greatness of His love and His beauty.

Life is so short....and Eternity is forever! Ruben will be missed....I just pray for his wife and kids he left behind. Lord, give them strength and peace that surpasses all understanding.

A Day in the life of a growing intercessor

Ok, so today I decided to start a new blog. I used to have a different one when I blogged from the night watch. But since I don't do the night watch here at the Orlando House of Prayer anymore, I figured to start fresh. I guess this is just a way to get some of those thoughts in my head out and into cyberspace.

So today I began reading this awesome book called Humility & Absolute Surrender by Andrew Murray. I'm actually on chapter 3 right now, and just had to write some thoughts going on in my head. Like, for instance, this book basically shows (so far) that the life of a Christian is of course, to be like Jesus. Now, in that, Jesus was and is the most humble man that exists to this day. If we are to be immitators of Christ, then our main focus and goal in our christian walk, is to live a life of complete humility. Whoa! If that isn't a heavy load I don't know what is. I mean, we as humans, live such a self centered lifestyle. Its pretty much about ourselves first and whoever or whatever after. But as a believer in Christ, its our mandate to live a selfless life. Where we become a servent of all. Meaning, we put everyone first before ourselves. Primarily our lives should be with the Lord being #1 on our list of importance, and then others after. Wow.

I guess my point to all this is just, that I am sitting here in the prayer room, thinking about my own walk with the Lord and the person that I am. Meaning, my character. If we are to live a life of humility, then that means, dying to ones' self. Basically learning how to give up my "me, me me" mentality, and being more about "what can I do for others, or how can I serve others". Ok, so that may be a little confusing to someone who doesn't understand the life of Christ, but its the only way I can explain whats in my head. I realize that I as a person, am quite opinionated. That I definitely have to change about myself. Its so difficult for me to keep my mouth shut. I know that is high on my priority list of change. I also get annoyed by people easily lately. I know that I have to work on that. I know God is using people around me, to teach me humility. Its not easy to choke back my comments or feelings of annoyance. I find myself continually just stopping to correct myself or being frustrated with myself after I let my mouth just run off with opinions or what not. This humility thing, is quite a challenge for me.

Here is an excerpt from the book: "This is the true self-denial to which our Savior calls us, the acknowledgment that self has nothing good in it, except as an empty vessel which God must fill, and that its claim to be or do anything may not for a moment be allowed. it is in this, above and before everything, in which the conformity to Jesus consists, the being and doing nothing of ourselves, that God may be all." Ok, now with a statement like that....how can you not be floored!

One thing I do enjoy about humility is the serving part. I am a giver. I love to give to people. I love being able to help people out with whatever they are going through. That is definitely part of my character I love. If I see someone in need, and its in my ability to give or help out somehow, I usually do. I don't like to hord things to myself and see others wishing and wanting. I would rather give it to someone else if its in my heart at that moment. My husband sometimes gets frustrated with me because I am always giving away shoes and clothes. I will give whatever I can away. I guess if I can't financially be able to give in my current state, then material things are next in line to give away. Its all I can do for now. Hopefully some day that will change.

Anyway, as I sit here in the prayer room, listening to Tito sing his worship with the word set, and as I read this book, I will continue to write my thoughts in my blog. (sigh....) I have a long way to go in my humility endeavors. This is pretty much step one.

At 6:00 is the intercession set. I plan on praying as much as I can for everything......and also just giving my heart to the Lord...and saying "fix me, cause I'm basically broken as can be". Until then.....chapter 4 is next...(gulp)!